HHEAL

Yesterday I woke up happy. What a difference a pain makes eh?

I gotta make sure I'm able to "breathe easy" and my ribs and back are "comfortable". (Cindi insists that I voice this positives in the positive. Yes "Momma Cindi") Anyway breathing easy and being comfortable are a key to my happy and manageable mind.

I woke up a little panicked just now. I just want to make sure I see my brother and his family, I want to go on vacation, I want to have good sex and I want to go on a meditation retreat. Isn't that silly. I feel more live LIVING more than I do DYING even though I've got worse news but I want to do it all. And good sex, is that not crazy or what? But I do, I want to see my family, go on vacation, sex and meditation. Those things don't go hand and hand at all! LOL

The only thing I feel I have let to do is leave something to my friends nen notame ne? I have this will that leaves things to my family so that they know but do my friends know how much I love them? I have Really great friends. People should be jealous of me just because of the friends I have. I've never been in love before (and even though for the first time in months I'm actually dreaming about MY future[the mind man, give it bad news and sometimes it'll surprise you]) if I were not to fall in love then having them in my life is a very close 2nd.

See Florie and Cindi above, don't they LOOK loveable (hee hee hee) and SILLY! LOL, bet they didn't expect me to post THESE on my blog. hahaha :D

I'm bringing my camera every where now, get ready loved ones we WILL be taking pictures! I don't care if you look busted that day!! :D


Happy
Healthy
Enlightened
And
Love

maybe next time I'll post of picture of my proposed wedding dress and engagement ring LOL!!

Oh. and I'm also giving love to my lungs. my brain. my left boob. my body. my mind.

And I gotta believe, that my suffering is benefiting others in some way. Some how, some where, some way the discomfort I have is taking the pain away from someone else. IT IS, I can't live thinking that it is not SO I'm going to have faith that someone, somewhere, somehow is not in pain but would have been, not uncomfortable but could have been, happy and might not have been. I believe that, it hurts too much to not believe it,so it is true for me. It's the truth to me.