Wednesday, August 17, 2011

my feet don't hurt

my legs don't hurt
my toes don't hurt
my nose doesn't hurt
my hand doesn't hurt
me eyes don't hurt
my lips don't hurt
my butt doesn't hurt
my belly button doesn't hurt
my right lung doesn't hurt
my right breast doesn't hurt

Cindi suggested giving love to my other parts during pain. Instead I chose to point out what doesn't hurt but it still worked some yesterday morning while I waited for the oxy to kick in.

Tuesday Cindi and I spoke to the Block Center nutritionist about my blood results and how to raise things that were too low and lower things that were too high by what I ate. I like the Block Center because there is research specifically for cancer behind everything they tell me to eat. So it was a very thorough conversation and was good to have before radiation because now I know to eat miso and green tea before hand and curcurmin to help my skin.

Jennifer M,Pontea, Cindi and I went to see Chicago at Wolf Trap on Tuesday night but since they don't have their lead singer it was like listening to a cover band of Chicago. Jennifer M thought that she was getting us tickets to the musical which was funny. Cindi and I were watching them perform and I started coughing and she turns to me and says "You know, you should really get that checked out" Funny girl.

I got 3 hours sleep Tuesday night, pain or coughing wakes me up.

Wednesday went to the MRI planning session where they make a mask for me for brain radiation. So up until this point I've been pretty much telling people stop smoking because the SYMPTOMS of lung cancer suck. Now I gotta add that getting a freakin mask that is tight against your face and neck when you can barely breathe to begin with, is pretty much up there with the WORST THING EVER. So I have 2 masks of me. I was able to hold my cool while they put on the HOT plastic and slid it around my face and nose and mouth keeping me in a permanent SMILE like the Joker in Batman.

but when it got to taping it down tighter?? Um, I was like I'm starting to freak out guys and then I was like take it off take it off! back to the drawing board. They are DEFINITELY gonna have to give me meds to calm me down when the actual procedure (that last an hour and is in a MRI machine not the CAT scan as it was today) is done.


yesterday's MRI was better however - the technician, Nettie, let's you select a pandora station so you can listen to music while inside. This was the FIRST time I was actually calm inside and thought it was even funny to be hearing LL Cool J's
"I need love" to the background of the buzzing and beeping and clanking of the MRI machine.

i am so pooped! i brought up the laundry and had to rest every 3 stairs to get it up 1 flight of steps. and it seems as if my tumor has moved to a place that covers one of my valves for breathing - last night was very difficult, I had dreams of going to the ER and having them drain me of the excess liquid. Every breathe is so labored.

last night I got about 5 hours so I feel a little better today. I think I convinced myself that someone was coming to help me and give me a thoracentesis and that made me feel better.

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